Live from Neorome

Give me my bread and circus. But first give me my circus. Have you gotten early to a movie lately? Have you seen the ads that theaters sell during that time? There is an incredible ad by Spike Lee that is like two minutes long for Verizon. He has that signature shot with the dolly or however he does that. The product itself is incredible. It is for a phone that lets you play games and watch video. Just in case you are ever waiting somewhere five minutes and your no attention span brain cannot bear to look at its emptiness anymore, instead you can pay to be entertained. No more having to think your own thoughts and come up with your own opinions. Just watch and let your whole life slip away.

I don't blame the theaters for this. They are just trying to capitalize on any revenue stream they can find. I'd say you'd have to that in this economy, but you actually do it in any economy. It is the free market in action. No, movies aren't the enemy. Even if you just watch the stupid ones, if you are watching them in the theater it can't take up that much of your time. And if it does, you probably have some serious issues anyway. The enemy is TV.

I'm not saying there is no art on television. I know there is. I've seen some of it. Some of it even tells you to stop watching. There is an episode of Futurama where Fry makes a comment about how you don't miss TV when you are on the road. This can slip past the censors, because almost no one will actually follow that advice. That may sum up television better than anything ever said.

The only way to consume a television show is like a book. Long marathons of one show. Without commercials. Learn to love it. Then throw it away. Don't be clamoring to bring it back or make a movie version of it. Make your own movie version of it. Live life like your in a television show if you like it that much. Or better yet write it because living it can be kind of hard. Unless you are doing it right, which you're probably not. I hate to break it to you, but Larry David is funny than you.

Fellow wage slaves of the world, unite! Throw down your remotes. Smash your plasma screens! Burn your DVDs!! You have nothing to lose but the ass-print on your sofa. If someone is using a TV show to sell you something, they are trying to brainwash you into wasting your money. If someone is giving you easy access to something that allows you to know a television character better then your own family, they are giving you an easy excuse to sleepwalk through life. Don't spend your life looking at the shadows in Plato's cave. Don't let your life become watching television shows. Read a book. Cook a meal. Have a conversation. Get outside. Fly a kite. Just do something. Anything but trying to empty your Netflix Queue or your TiVo.